"Susan" Heffley

Susan "Mommie" Heffley

Susan Heffley is a mean, stupid lady. She was born on May 15, 1940, which is very early for a mom. When she was 22 months old, she partially lost her vision, and by 30 months, her father died from three severe high fevers (106, 102, 110 degrees fahrenheit). No one wants to talk about it except the most extreme geeks.

Susan went to school at the age of 6. Her best friend was Pearl Gibbs (Hideous Ferrari Gibbs' stupid sister), which was also her only friend. Al the students back then thought she had the plague, for she touched Hideous Ferrari Gibbs during birth time.

Susan had a good childhood. When she was in Grade 12, she fell in love with Loki Gibbs (Gibbs' brother). In winter 1957, she started dating Loki, and they remained steady for a few months. Because Susan was very, very stupid and mean, they ended up being enemies. But Susan was still as happy as a mouse.

In the '60s, Susan got married, and gave birth to three children. But in 1984, the husband and three children died due to the Treehouse of Horror XXXI. It figures.

In 1995, she married Mack Gibbs, and gave birth to a lot. They had the adventures youèd see today.

It figures.